Christian Pick Up Lines

Just a few lines I found for you guys (and gals) out there looking to pick up a special someone...or impress them on a first date.

• Would you like to join my Purpose Driven Life?
• Mark Driscoll takes up 35% of my ipod memory.
• Is it a sin that you stole my heart?
• A friend of mine told me I should meet you. I think you know him. Jesus, yeah that’s his name.
• Nice Bracelet. What Would Jesus Date? I mean…Do?
• It's obvious to me that you sprouted from the good soil.
• I just don't feel called to celibacy.
• Excuse me. I believe one of my ribs belongs to you.
• Excuse me. I believe one of your ribs belongs to me.
• Man does not live on bread alone. How about dinner?
• I don't see it myself, but people tell me I look like Michael W. Smith.
• You don't have an accountability partner? Me neither!
• I have a job and I’m willing to move out of home.
• My favorite species of vegetation is the church plant.
• Now I know why Solomon had 700 wives...because he never met you.
• Is that a thinline, duo-tone, compact, ESV Travel Bible in your pocket?
• So, my parents are home, you wanna come over?
• Let me remove my sandals before I come any closer.
• I'm a proverbs 32 kind of guy and you're a proverbs 31 kind of woman...

• Mmm...you really have to watch out for that man of lawlessness…but don’t worry, I’m not him, so you're safe with me.
• I’m interested in full time ministry, and not only that... I also play the guitar.
• Look, you're nearly 22. Most Christians are 3 years into marriage by now... just settle for me.
• I will never give you reason to hammer a tent peg through my skull.
• Hi, I'm Calvin. You were meant to choose me.
• Hi, My name is Will, God’s Will
• I would have asked you out to dinner, but I just put all my money in the offering basket.

Eulogy of a Goldfish

He was just a fair fish. It was several years ago when I first met Ginto/Goucho. At the time he was simply a cousin of mine, but a little under 2 years ago I adopted him (and his sister Tamira) as my own.

He came with me to college Junior year where, the two of them were the talk of many laughter filled roommate conversations. Over Christmas break of 2009 Ginto/Goucho was attacked by a freshwater lobster and suffered from resulting ailments ever since.

Thanks to Google and Wikipedia we determined he must have had a swim bladder condition which impaired his ability to control his movement in the water. Yes I had a handicapped fish. He would break into random spits of flipping and twirling around the tank. Usually around feeding time, but also on random occasions.

There were several occasions where we had thought he wasn't going to make it. Especially last year when he was floating upside down. And this past fall when he didn't move off the bottom of the tank for several days. However, he was a trooper. A real fighter. He persevered through it all and we (my roommates and I) were convinced he was going to live nearly forever (Goldfish can live up to 25 years...thanks again Google).

Sadly on January 19th 2011 Ginto/Goucho said goodbye to this world. We found him stuck to the filter..and somberly flushed him to his watery grave.

Just a few short days later, in her mournful state Tamira attempted to escape from the tank too. (Maybe it was because she had been exposed to several hours of consecutive Prison Break episode for the past two days...that might have given her some ideas). As I was watching Prision Break I heard a noise from the tank and turned to see a gold body wiggle up through a small hole in the lid of the tank near the filter. Seconds later it dropped to the floor. I began my rescue mission which sucessfully returned Tamira from her position behind the couch to the life giving waters of the tank. She is currently in recovery and still seems a little under the weather, but is doing fine.

Isaiah 24:1-6

1)Behold, the LORD lays the earth waste, devastates it, distorts it's surface and scatters its inhabitants. 2) and the people will be like the priets, the servant like his master, the maid like her mistress, the buyer like the seller, the lender like the boffower, the creditor like the debtor. 3) The earth will be completely laid waste and completely despoiled, for the LORD has spoken this word. 4) The earth mournes and withers, the world fades and withers, the exalted of the people of the earth fade away. 5) The earth is also polluted by its inhabitatns, for they trangressed laws, biolated statues, broke the everlasting covenant. 6) Therefore, a curse devours the earth, and those who life in it are held guilty. Therefore, the inhabitatns of the earth and burned, and few men are left.

I'm currently taking a class called "Environmental Ethics". We talk a lot about our responsibility to be stewards/caretakers of the earth and about issues facing the planet such as pollution, trash, food crisis, clean water, etc. I was reading Isaiah this morning and this passage (subtibled "Judgement on the Earth") has a little to say about how we should view what's happening around us, but also our responsibility toward it.

Caught this by accident...